In classrooms across the country, a quiet revolution is taking place. Teachers and educators are expanding their lessons beyond math and reading to include something just as essential: Social Emotional Learning (SEL). At the heart of SEL are five key areas, known as the core SEL competencies. These competencies form the foundation for helping children develop into compassionate, responsible, and resilient individuals.
Let’s take a closer look at what each of these SEL competencies means, how they show up in everyday learning, and why they matter so much—both in the classroom and beyond.
What Are SEL Competencies?
SEL competencies are research-backed areas of development that support a child’s ability to understand and manage emotions, build strong relationships, and make thoughtful decisions. Developed by the Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning (CASEL), the five competencies are:
- Self-awareness
- Self-management
- Social awareness
- Relationship skills
- Responsible decision-making
These areas offer a framework for educators to build a supportive and emotionally intelligent classroom culture. The following outlines why these competencies matter and the ways they can be incorporated into classrooms.
1. Self-Awareness: Knowing Yourself
Self-awareness is the ability to recognize your emotions, thoughts, and values—and understand how they influence behavior.
For example, a student who realizes they’re feeling frustrated before a test is practicing self-awareness. With that insight, they can use tools to calm themselves before it escalates into anxiety or avoidance.
Children who develop strong self-awareness are more confident and more likely to advocate for their needs. They learn to identify their strengths and areas for growth, which supports academic performance and overall well-being.
Support it in your classroom with:
- The Feelings Poster: Tools of the Heart
- Activities that can include journaling, vision boards and strength spotting
2. Self-Management: Handling Emotions and Behaviors
Self-management is the ability to regulate emotions, control impulses, and persist in the face of challenges.
This competency helps students manage stress, delay gratification, and maintain focus—especially when things get tough. Whether they’re taking turns in group work or bouncing back from a low grade, self-management empowers kids to respond rather than react.
This doesn’t mean kids will never feel upset or angry—it means they learn how to manage those big feelings in healthy, productive ways.
Encourage self-management with:
3. Social Awareness: Understanding Others
Social awareness involves recognizing and respecting the feelings, perspectives, and experiences of others.
It’s what allows students to build empathy, appreciate differences, and act with kindness. In diverse classroom settings, social awareness is key to creating inclusive environments where every student feels like they belong.
This skill helps students understand how their actions affect others—and encourages them to respond with compassion.
Foster social awareness through:
4. Relationship Skills: Connecting with Others
From making friends to working in teams, relationship skills help children form positive connections and resolve conflicts peacefully.
These skills include active listening, clear communication, cooperation, and conflict resolution. When students develop relationship skills, they learn how to build trust, handle disagreements, and support one another.
Practice relationship skills with:
5. Responsible Decision-Making: Choosing Wisely
Responsible decision-making involves making thoughtful, ethical, and constructive choices about personal and social behavior.
This competency teaches children to evaluate situations, consider consequences, and reflect on their values. It’s the difference between reacting impulsively and choosing with intention.
As students grow, these skills become vital for resisting peer pressure, setting boundaries, and navigating real-life situations with confidence and integrity.
Nurture decision-making skills with:
- Class agreements and reflection-based discussions
- Opportunities to make choices and evaluate outcomes
Why SEL Competencies Matter
When SEL is woven into the fabric of daily classroom life, students thrive. These five SEL competencies equip students not only to succeed academically, but also to grow into caring, capable, and community-minded people.
Educators who center these competencies help children learn how to:
- Understand themselves and others
- Express emotions constructively
- Navigate conflict with empathy
- Make thoughtful decisions
- Create stronger relationships with peers and adults
And when that happens, classrooms transform into places of safety, connection, and possibility.
Bring SEL Competencies to Life with Soul Shoppe
At Soul Shoppe, we offer engaging, age-appropriate resources to help teachers bring these core competencies into their classrooms with ease and heart.
Explore our full range of programs and tools to support SEL:
And don’t forget to visit our blog for free SEL resources and ideas.
Empowering the Whole Child
Teaching the five SEL competencies is more than just a checklist—it’s an invitation to create a classroom rooted in compassion, self-discovery, and resilience. When children feel seen, supported, and capable, they carry that confidence with them for life.
Social Emotional Learning helps kids become the kind of people who make the world a better place—and that’s a lesson worth teaching every day.
In today’s classrooms, there is a growing recognition that success isn’t only measured in test scores. Educators, researchers, and parents are realizing that a child’s ability to navigate emotions, build relationships, and make responsible decisions directly impacts their academic growth.
This is where Social Emotional Learning (SEL) comes in—and why it matters more than ever.
Let’s explore the powerful connection between SEL and academic success, how it reduces behavioral challenges, and why every school benefits from centering emotional intelligence in its curriculum.
What Is SEL and Why SEL Matters?
Social Emotional Learning (SEL) is the process through which children (and adults) develop essential skills like self-awareness, self-regulation, empathy, and relationship building. These skills are foundational—not just for life success, but for thriving in the classroom.
When we ask “why SEL matters,” we’re really asking: What kind of learners—and what kind of humans—do we want to develop?
SEL matters because it addresses the whole child, recognizing that emotional health and academic achievement go hand in hand. It gives students the tools they need to stay focused, manage conflict, bounce back from failure, and contribute meaningfully to their community.
Visit our Social Emotional Learning homepage to see how SEL looks in real classrooms.
The Research: SEL and Academic Gains
According to a landmark meta-analysis from CASEL (Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning), students who participated in SEL programs showed an average 11 percentile-point gain in academic performance compared to peers who didn’t receive SEL instruction.
Additional findings include:
- Improved classroom behavior
- Better attitudes toward school
- Increased ability to manage stress and depression
- Higher graduation and college enrollment rates
When children feel emotionally safe, valued, and connected, they learn more. Emotional intelligence doesn’t distract from academics; it amplifies them.
Why SEL Reduces Behavioral Issues
When children lack the language or tools to express their emotions, those feelings often show up in disruptive or withdrawn behavior. SEL offers proactive tools, not reactive punishments.
With SEL:
- Students learn how to name their emotions, rather than act them out.
- Conflict becomes an opportunity to practice respectful communication.
- Classrooms shift from power struggles to partnerships.
By teaching students how to manage frustration, disappointment, or social tension, we reduce office referrals, suspensions, and missed learning opportunities. More time is spent teaching and connecting, and less time is spent correcting.
Explore how Tools of the Heart helps students manage big feelings and stay engaged.
The Link Between Emotional Safety and Learning
The brain is designed for survival first, learning second. If a child feels unsafe, anxious, or emotionally overwhelmed, their brain devotes energy to protecting them—not absorbing new information.
SEL supports:
- Predictability through classroom routines
- Security through trusting relationships
- Calm through emotional regulation tools
These conditions free the brain to focus on curiosity, exploration, and critical thinking. In short: SEL creates the conditions for learning to flourish.
Academic Skills Are Social-Emotional Skills
Many of the skills we label “academic” are actually deeply tied to social-emotional abilities:
| Academic Skill |
SEL Competency That Supports It |
| Following directions |
Self-management, social awareness |
| Completing assignments |
Responsible decision-making, perseverance |
| Working in groups |
Relationship skills, empathy |
| Asking for help |
Self-awareness, confidence |
| Managing test anxiety |
Self-regulation, emotional vocabulary |
When we strengthen SEL competencies, we also improve a child’s ability to engage academically.
How SEL Levels the Educational Playing Field
Not all students arrive at school with the same emotional toolkit. Factors like trauma, cultural differences, neurodiversity, or language barriers can influence how students express and manage emotions.
SEL provides an equitable foundation. It teaches every student—regardless of background or ability—how to:
- Advocate for their needs
- Recognize their own emotions and triggers
- Build positive relationships with peers and adults
- Make constructive choices in the face of conflict
When we teach SEL explicitly, we close opportunity gaps and foster an inclusive classroom culture.
Learn more about our Elementary SEL curriculum designed for diverse learners.
What SEL Looks Like in Action
At Soul Shoppe, we believe SEL should be woven into the rhythm of the school day—not a one-time lesson. Here’s what SEL looks like in real classrooms:
- Peace Corners, where students can cool down and reflect
- Morning circles, to check in emotionally and build connection
- Conflict resolution tools like the Peace Path
- Feelings posters that help children name and process emotions
- Class agreements that promote shared values and respect
When SEL is consistent, it becomes a shared language of growth.
SEL Isn’t an Extra—It’s Essential
So, why does SEL matter?
Because academic excellence and emotional intelligence are not in competition—they are partners. SEL gives students the tools to succeed not just on paper, but in life. It prepares them for the challenges of the world by teaching them how to understand themselves and connect with others.
If we want learners who are curious, confident, and compassionate—SEL is where we start.
In the daily whirlwind of classroom life—tests, transitions, and tricky social dynamics—students carry more than just books in their backpacks. They carry self-doubt, pressure to fit in, and fears of failure. That’s why one small yet powerful tool can make a big difference: positive affirmations for students.
More than just “feel-good” phrases, affirmations are a way to build confidence, resilience, and emotional grounding. They help students see their worth, especially when the world feels uncertain.
In this post, we’ll explore how affirmations support Social Emotional Learning (SEL), promote student confidence, and contribute to a safe, inclusive classroom culture. Plus, we’ll share ready-to-use affirmations you can start using right away.
What Are Positive Affirmations for Students?
Positive affirmations are short, encouraging statements that students say or hear to reinforce their strengths, values, and potential. Think of them as internal messages that rewire how students view themselves—especially in moments of doubt or challenge.
Instead of:
“I’m not good at this.”
Try:
“I can improve with practice.”
These statements aren’t magic. But when repeated consistently, they begin to shape how students respond to setbacks, peer pressure, and internal criticism.
How Positive Affirmations for Students Support Social Emotional Learning (SEL)
Positive affirmations align beautifully with core SEL competencies like self-awareness, self-management, and resilience.
Here’s how they help:
- Build Emotional Vocabulary: Affirmations give students the words they may not yet have to express hope, strength, or calm.
- Strengthen Self-Image: Repeated positive self-talk nurtures inner beliefs, helping students see themselves as capable and worthy.
- Encourage Growth Mindset: Affirmations shift the focus from fixed ability (“I can’t do this”) to effort and learning (“I’m growing every day”).
- Calm the Nervous System: In anxious moments, repeating affirmations can reduce stress and re-center attention.
Discover our Tools of the Heart program, which helps children recognize and respond to big emotions with kindness and confidence.
Ready-to-Use Affirmations for the Classroom
Here’s a list of affirmations that are developmentally appropriate, inclusive, and ideal for classroom use. These can be used during morning meetings, transitions, or even written on the board.
Self-Worth Affirmations
- I am enough, just as I am.
- I have important things to say.
- My voice matters.
Growth Mindset Affirmations
- Mistakes help me learn.
- I can try again.
- I am always learning.
Empathy and Kindness Affirmations
- I choose to be kind to others.
- I treat people the way I want to be treated.
- I am a peacemaker.
Confidence and Courage Affirmations
- I believe in myself.
- I can do hard things.
- I am brave, even when I feel nervous.
Emotional Regulation Affirmations
- I can take deep breaths when I feel upset.
- My feelings are valid.
- I can pause and make a good choice.
You might even invite students to write their own affirmations and share them during class meetings.
Making Affirmations a Daily Habit
To create lasting impact, affirmations should be consistent, intentional, and visible. Here are a few simple ways to integrate them into daily classroom routines:
- Affirmation Wall: Dedicate a space on the wall where students can add their own positive statements.
- Morning Mantras: Begin each day with a class-wide affirmation said aloud.
- Journaling Prompts: Ask students to write an affirmation and reflect on how it applies to their day.
- Peace Corner Cards: Include affirmation cards in a calming space where students can reset emotionally.
- Partner Practice: Pair students to take turns saying affirmations to each other—helping both the speaker and listener internalize positive messages.
These small practices can shift the classroom culture from one of performance pressure to one of emotional safety and encouragement.
Browse our Elementary SEL Curriculum for tools that support daily positive affirmations for students and emotional check-ins.
Creating a Classroom That Believes in Every Student
When children repeatedly hear, “You are safe. You belong. You matter,” they start to believe it.
Affirmations aren’t about ignoring challenges or sugarcoating emotions—they’re about reminding students that they have tools, worth, and inner strength to face whatever comes their way.
Imagine a classroom where children encourage themselves, comfort each other, and meet setbacks with compassion. That’s the power of affirmations. And that’s the kind of culture Social Emotional Learning is built to foster.
Let’s give students messages that stick with them long after the bell rings.
Kindness isn’t just a one-time act. It’s a habit—a way of being that helps children build deeper connections, develop empathy, and create inclusive communities. Teaching kindness is one of the most powerful ways adults can shape not only a classroom, but a future.
In this post, we’ll explore how to go beyond random acts of kindness and instill consistent, internalized habits of compassion in children. We’ll also share resources and tools from our Elementary SEL curriculum, including Tools of the Heart, Planet Responsibility, Free to Be, and Respect Differences.
Why kindness needs to be taught—not assumed
While kindness comes naturally to many children in small doses, it’s not always second nature in challenging moments. Teaching kindness requires intention. It means helping children learn about empathy, what kindness looks like in different situations, and how to make it a habit—especially when it’s hard.
Without guidance, kids might rely on surface-level gestures like compliments or sharing supplies. But real kindness goes deeper. It includes:
- Recognizing someone else’s needs
- Taking action to support them
- Practicing emotional regulation and patience
- Speaking up or offering help, even when it’s inconvenient
By creating space to practice and reflect, we help children see kindness as a mindset—not just a moment.
How to teach kindness in the classroom and at home
Here are several ways to build a kindness-centered environment for children:
1. Model kindness consistently
Children learn from what we do more than what we say. Show compassion to others in your everyday interactions—hold space for someone’s feelings, offer a thoughtful gesture, or apologize sincerely when needed.
2. Make kindness visible
Create a classroom or household kindness wall. Use it to record everyday moments when someone helped, encouraged, or included another person. This helps reinforce the value of kind actions and builds community.
3. Incorporate daily reflection
Ask simple questions like:
- Who did you help today?
- How did someone make you feel seen?
- Was there a time you could have been kinder?
Reflection supports the internalization of kindness and helps children develop emotional awareness.
4. Use routines and rituals
Integrate kindness into morning meetings, closings, or transitions. Even a consistent ritual like “pass the kindness” circle time—where students say something kind about a peer—can build habit and connection.
Kindness activities for kids that go beyond random acts
Intentional kindness activities for kids help move the concept from theory to practice. Consider these ideas for school or home:
- Kindness scavenger hunt: Challenge kids to find ways to help five different people throughout the week.
- Kindness journal: Keep track of kind acts received and given. Have students write or draw their experiences.
- Compliment chain: Each student writes a genuine compliment to someone and passes it on. Watch the chain grow!
- Gratitude circles: Once a week, share something you’re grateful for about someone in the group.
You can also explore kindness games that build teamwork and empathy. Games like “Kindness Charades” or role-playing different scenarios help children practice kind responses in real time.
Teaching kindness through SEL-aligned tools
The Tools of the Heart program provides structured approaches for building emotional and relational skills. Tools like “Stop & Breathe” and “Peace Path” empower students to regulate their emotions, repair harm, and choose kind behavior—even in moments of frustration.
In addition, our Free to Be anti-bullying course helps children understand the emotional impact of their actions. It teaches empathy and responsibility as foundational components of kindness.
Programs like Respect Differences also play a key role in helping children understand how kindness extends beyond immediate relationships—it also means honoring people’s identities, cultures, and differences.
Creating a kindness-focused classroom culture
Kindness thrives in environments where inclusion, safety, and respect are woven into daily life. Here’s how to create a culture that supports kindness:
- Use inclusive language: Replace labels or judgments with curiosity and understanding.
- Celebrate diversity: Talk openly about what makes each person unique. Refer to Respect Differences for ways to do this.
- Set clear expectations: Build community agreements around kindness, and revisit them regularly.
- Address mistakes with compassion: When a student misses the mark, treat it as a teaching moment—not a failure.
Teaching kindness lesson plans
If you’re looking for structured guidance, teaching kindness lesson plans can help reinforce consistency across your curriculum. Look for plans that include:
- Discussion prompts for self-reflection and empathy
- Role-play scenarios for navigating real-life challenges
- Hands-on projects like letter writing or service activities
- Games to teach kindness that are developmentally appropriate and engaging
You can also integrate lessons from Planet Responsibility to help kids understand how kindness relates to community, environment, and their broader impact on the world.
Why consistency matters more than random acts
While a random act of kindness can brighten someone’s day, it’s the habit of kindness that truly transforms lives.
Kids need more than moments—they need repetition, reinforcement, and relationships that reflect kindness as a core value. When kindness is part of the routine—not a reward—it becomes part of their identity.
Over time, these small but powerful moments become the foundation for emotionally aware, inclusive, and resilient communities.
Kindness is a daily choice
Teaching kindness isn’t about perfection. It’s about presence. By offering children the tools, language, and space to practice compassion regularly, we teach them how to live in connection—with themselves, with others, and with their communities.
Let’s move beyond teaching “nice” and start building real, lasting kindness—one thoughtful moment at a time.
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In a world that often feels fast-paced and unpredictable, children thrive on something simple: consistency. Routines for kids are more than just checklists or schedules—they are emotional anchors. Predictable routines provide children with a sense of safety, helping them regulate emotions, reduce anxiety, and build resilience.
In this post, we’ll explore how daily routines support emotional development, how routines differ from procedures and rules, and offer actionable ways to build supportive structure both at home and in the classroom. We’ll also connect these practices to social emotional learning, including our Tools of the Heart Elementary SEL curriculum.
Why do routines matter for kids?
At every developmental stage, routines help kids feel emotionally grounded. From morning wake-ups to classroom transitions, a daily routine creates a sense of what to expect, which in turn creates emotional safety. When children can anticipate what comes next, they feel more in control—and less overwhelmed.
The emotional benefits of routines:
- Reduces stress and anxiety: When children know what’s coming, it eases the mental load of uncertainty.
- Supports emotional regulation: Predictable structure helps reduce emotional outbursts and supports transitions.
- Fosters independence: Kids learn to manage their time, tasks, and expectations with increased confidence.
- Reinforces connection: Shared routines between parents, teachers, and students build trust and a sense of belonging.
Creating routines is one of the most foundational ways we support emotional wellness.
How to establish routines that stick
Whether at home or in school, establishing routines starts with clarity and consistency. Here are some strategies to help you create a child routine schedule that supports both structure and emotional health.
1. Use visual tools
For younger children or visual learners, try a child routine chart with pictures and simple labels. This visual cue helps children track what’s next and gives them a sense of ownership over the process.
2. Involve kids in the planning
When children help decide the order of tasks—like brushing teeth, packing a backpack, or choosing their reading time—they’re more likely to buy into the routine and feel empowered.
3. Keep it flexible, but predictable
Routines don’t have to be rigid. You can allow flexibility within a framework. For example, reading can happen after dinner or before bed, as long as it’s part of the evening rhythm.
4. Link new routines to existing ones
This strategy, called “habit stacking,” helps reinforce new patterns. For example: “After you hang up your backpack, that’s when we check the homework folder.”
Difference between routines and procedures
In the classroom, routines and procedures often go hand-in-hand—but they’re not the same thing.
- Routines are behaviors repeated consistently. Example: students entering quietly and starting a bellringer activity.
- Procedures are specific steps to complete a task. Example: the steps for turning in homework.
Understanding the difference between routines and procedures helps teachers clarify expectations and create a calm, emotionally supportive environment.
Routines vs. rules: What’s the difference?
While rules tend to focus on behavior management (e.g., “Keep hands to yourself”), routines focus on creating flow (e.g., “When we line up, we face forward and keep space between each other”).
Whereas rules tell students what not to do, routines offer guidance on how to do something effectively. This supports not only behavior but also confidence and community.
Classroom routines that build emotional security
Strong classroom routines help students settle into their learning environment and feel like they belong. Here are a few key categories that contribute to emotional grounding:
1. Classroom entry routines
Greeting students by name, offering a check-in question, or pointing to a “How Are You Feeling?” chart helps students shift into the learning mindset.
2. Routine classroom activities
Whether it’s morning meetings, journaling, or rotating classroom jobs, these recurring moments provide structure and stability.
3. Lesson opening strategies
Start lessons with a consistent rhythm. This could be a question of the day, a moment of quiet breathing, or a warm-up problem.
4. Lesson closure strategies
Give students a sense of completion by ending lessons with reflection. Ask, “What did you learn?” or use exit tickets to summarize.
These daily rituals don’t just support academics—they provide emotional containers for students to manage their energy, express feelings, and regulate behavior.
A sample daily routine of a school-going child
Here’s an example of a daily routine of a school-going child that emphasizes emotional grounding:
- 7:00 AM – Wake up and dress
- 7:30 AM – Eat breakfast and pack backpack
- 8:00 AM – Arrive at school and participate in classroom entry routine
- 9:00 AM – Core academics (with transitions marked by breathing breaks)
- Noon – Lunch and outdoor play
- 1:00 PM – Afternoon lesson and group project
- 2:30 PM – Closing circle and reflection
- 3:00 PM – Return home and snack
- 4:00 PM – Homework or creative play
- 6:00 PM – Dinner and family talk time
- 7:30 PM – Reading, bath, and bedtime wind-down
This structure creates emotional ease while still allowing space for creativity, exploration, and connection.
How Tools of the Heart supports routines
Tools of the Heart provides specific strategies for building emotional awareness into everyday routines. For example, “Take 5 Breaths” becomes a calming ritual for transitions. Or “Clean It Up” becomes a reliable step after mistakes or conflict.
Integrating these tools into routine classroom activities helps students internalize emotional regulation without it feeling like a separate “lesson.” Instead, it’s woven into how the classroom operates.
Routines and SEL: The bigger picture
Incorporating routines is an essential part of a larger social emotional learning approach. When students feel safe, seen, and supported through consistent routines, they’re more prepared to:
- Engage in learning
- Collaborate with peers
- Resolve conflict constructively
- Express their needs respectfully
Soul Shoppe’s Elementary SEL curriculum reinforces these connections between structure and emotional growth, giving teachers and families the tools they need to guide students from the inside out.
Building emotional resilience through structure
At its core, a routine is a promise. A promise that the adult world is safe, predictable, and steady. For children, that promise is deeply grounding.
Through daily routines, intentional planning, and tools that support emotional regulation, we give kids more than structure—we give them confidence. Confidence in themselves, in the people guiding them, and in their ability to navigate life’s ups and downs.
Even small rituals—a morning hello, a consistent cleanup routine, a breath before transitions—build emotional muscle. Over time, these habits create emotionally grounded, socially aware, and resilient learners.
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